Quotes
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There are 276 approved (and 1 pending) quotes in 15 categories.
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Here are the 15 newest quotes:
I like clothes and make-up, I like the transformation… But a lot of men had problems. It’s one of those strange things. A man will go, ‘You fucking queer.’ And you just think, ‘Well, your girlfriend fancies me.’
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
It’s like we’re twins; we’re kind of symbiotically linked, if he drinks, I get drunk. Like E.T and Elliot.
said by: Julian Barratt | Category: Julian Barratt
said by: Julian Barratt | Category: Julian Barratt
Englishmen do like to get in a dress, any excuse.
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
When I was 13 I told my dad I’d rather kill myself than do an ordinary job. He vaguely muttered something about how I’d need to earn a living somehow, but he’s been totally behind me, forking out money he didn’t really have to send me to university. Every other comedian I’ve met had to fight their parents to be allowed to do this but mine have been brilliant.
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
I did work in a bakery for one day. But the boss went off and when he came back I was lying on the floor eating cakes.
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
said by: Noel Fielding | Category: Noel Fielding
Ooh, Im Howard Moon, I know how to use my talky round hole!
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
I run a business and the numbers just don't add up, let me explain, this is the number 2, he owns a coffee shop, and this is the number 9, 9 is a customer, right? One day 9 goes in and 2 goes 'I don't have a coffee house no more, I have a knife fighting academy.' And number 9 goes 'I want coffee' and number 2 goes 'NO! I'm gunna slice you and learn how to slice others' And 9 goes 'I can't, I gotta get out of here' and 2 goes 'I'VE LOCKED THE DOOR' Anyway that means I can't put you on the bill.
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
I'm Bob Fossil and if you don't know my name then you're lame. Shit that was bad! Can we go again? Cut the music. Is anybody listening? What are you singing for? You suck balls!
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
I love archeology, it makes me feel like a topless puppy!
said by: Dr. Henry J | Category: Other Characters
said by: Dr. Henry J | Category: Other Characters
We're in deep diarrhoea.
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
Listen you little suckball, we all want our mummys! But we can't have them. 'Cause they're in VIETNAM! LOOK REALITY IN THE FACE AND LICK IT!
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
Who are you? Zorro on gay night?
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
Howard Moon! As I breathe and stink.
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
You ever felt a bullet-proof vest against your naked skin? It's better than beautiful. It's... beauteous.
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
You know, technically you're not a peeping tom if it's one of your relatives.
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil
said by: Bob Fossil | Category: Bob Fossil